idk

 couldnt help but i,

am not okay,

am depressed,

am hopeless,

am everything down.

wanted to ask for help but i;

keep holding back,

reminding myself;

they're busy,

am i just reaching for them when im only sad?

am i selfish?

they have their own life.

i love humans but;

why do i think like this?

why do i think that they hated me?

why do i dont like human at the same time?

im always like this;

i isolate myself right after i socialize,

i tell myself to stop after we laughed together,

i keep reminding myself that the world doesnt revolve around me,

that theyll leave me one day,

that ill be alone one day,

i cant burden them with my sadness,

why?;

no one need to know,

no one can know,

but i really want them to know,

that im not okay,

i want them to ask me,

am i okay?

but then ill look ridiculous,

im not matured enough,

im like that,

that's why i hate me.

please dont let me be alone.

but please dont feel burdened.

i dont know anymore